Faith & Spirituality

Pointing the Finger

by Angie Ledbetter

One of the reasons people most often give for not attending church is that they don't want to be in a building full of hypocrites. To their way of thinking, or from actual experience, these folks have dealt with Christians who are not living the Gospel day to day. This makes it hard to want to get up early and go sit on a hard pew next to them. But there are a few things we can do to overcome these hurdles.

by Angie Ledbetter

One of the reasons people most often give for not attending church is that they don't want to be in a building full of hypocrites. To their way of thinking, or from actual experience, these folks have dealt with Christians who are not living the Gospel day to day. This makes it hard to want to get up early and go sit on a hard pew next to them. But there are a few things we can do to overcome these hurdles.

Judging Not

Giving out advice or knowing Scripture by heart does not impress this growing number of disgruntled parishioners we'll call the S.H.A.R.C.s (Stay Home and Rest Crowd.) Likewise, if we want our brethren to return to worship with us, pointing the finger at their failings and sinfulness does nothing to make the SHARCs want to swim back into community prayer once again.

No one likes to be judged; especially by someone they deem to be acting in a superior or sanctimonious manner. Nothing turns us off or makes us want to rebel more than to be told we're not living right by someone we would never want to imitate in the first place. We have to always be careful about our thoughts, actions, and words toward others until we've spent a good deal of time getting to know the person in the mirror -- warts and all.

When we make a habit out of criticizing others' habits, looks, culture, or lifestyle, we run the risk of turning those same folks away from a closer communion with Christ. Trying to make them feel bad for not attending mass by using the guilt treatment seldom works either.

Breaking Old Habits

To do a better job of evangelizing for Him, we need to remember the cliché about books and their covers. After all, we don't have the ability to truly judge the hearts of others with any real accuracy.

Often, something we are just 100% sure of about a person is not in the least true. I've been judged to be a certain kind of person because I sport an ankle tattoo, and the reason I know that is because, after getting to know me better, those people have often sheepishly tell me what they'd first presumed about me.

Recalling that we are to judge not (Matthew 7:1 - "Do not judge, or you too will be judged.") can help us curb those criticisms we harbor about others. Even if we are correct in our assumptions and judgments, what good does it do us unless we use that knowledge to help them in some way?

And here's a scary thought -- many psychologists say that the very things we fear and dislike in others, we ourselves are capable of doing or are currently engaged in. That makes me want to shut my mouth up and turn off judgmental thoughts immediately! My Mom has a saying that sums up the judging habit nicely -- "Just remember, when you point the finger at someone else, you still have four fingers pointing back at yourself."

Try a Better Way

Scripture gives us clear direction on judgmental behavior:

Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? (Matthew 7:3)

We can also see what Jesus thought on this matter.

When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." (John 8:7)

So, when next you meet up with a SHARC, why not say, "Hi. How're you doing? I'm so glad to meet you," or "Is there something I can do for you today?" or "Can I help you carry those heavy groceries? I'm Mr. Smith and I'd love for you to visit our church some day."

What a change from automatically dismissing a potential friend and future Christian because of the way she's dressed, or whispering to others that, "He just has the most awful habits." Don't be a hypocrite. Be a true Christian.